A Drove of Asses

Is there anyone alive out there!!???

2006-09-10T23:43:00.000+01:00

I just thought I'd post to see if anyone noticed.

Wow

2006-04-19T19:43:00.000+01:00

People are still posting here! I'm in shock. I've not dropped in since October.

Oops

2006-03-23T20:18:00.000Z

Argh. Can you believe I accidentally wrote a blog post meant for my blog here by mistake? Argh!

Mecca

2006-03-20T21:46:00.000Z

Green Wing Forum

I need say no more.

Bill Bailey hurrah!!

2005-12-28T18:35:00.000Z

Dean bought me Bill Bailey Cosmic Jam for Christmas. I've not watched it yet. Has anyone else seen it? Good old Bill, just looking at his little face makes me laugh. I saw a bloke on the subway in New York who was the spitting image of Bill Bailey. It was quite terrifying but highly amusing. Perhaps it was him in fact.

Comedy awards

2005-12-15T15:33:00.000Z

Bah, gah and grrrrrr. I might kick something. Then again I'd only hurt my toe and fall over and I have no audience so what's the point?

Something a bit festive..........

2005-12-08T17:08:00.000Z

A HIDEOUSLY DECORATED CHRISTMAS TREE!!!

Notice

2005-11-19T01:27:00.000Z

Um, annoyingly my Wanadoo email account has run out due to me not using my 'Wanadoo dial up' within 90 days, due to me not actually having a Wanadoo dial up because I signed up just to get the free account. Anyway, none of this matters at all because I don't use the account for anything, except it was the email address I set up for the forwarding of comments on this blog to everyone, so annoyingly there won't be any comments being forwarded anymore unless I can find a new free acount that works in Outlook express or something. Just in case anyone was wondering where their comments were. It's gone 1.00 o'clock and I've started drinking coffee, a bad idea.

Has anyone seen Mrs Peggerty???

2005-10-05T13:49:00.000+01:00

She left her umbrella in my kitchen.

There we go

2005-09-08T14:54:00.000+01:00

Take this book,

2005-09-01T14:11:00.000+01:00

http://www.play.com/play247.asp?page=title&r=BOOK&title=251055&p=91&g=148&pa=sr

and fack off.

Awww look at the wee baby!!!!

2005-08-02T00:10:00.000+01:00

3 Is this Seasons Must Have 'New Black' Number

2005-07-24T18:01:00.000+01:00

Forget london 2012, 3 is the number which answers all our problems.
Here are the results of our poll as promised: The conclusion is that the best number is 3. Possibly because it was easiest to get to in terms of the mouse and then there was that incident with the curtain pole which rendered 2 invisible.

1 and 5 would have singled people out as being extreme so people who chose 1 or 5 ar obviously into extreme sports like fortune telling. As for number 4, well, that hardly exists these days what with computers and everything.

Poppy was correct in her prediction that 3 would be the most popular number, while Biscuits failed miserably by predicting 2, despite scoring highly in previous psychic energy tests, I'll have you know.

Thanks you for voting if you did, even though you probably can't remember as it was so long ago. This was because it took a long time to collate the results. We used a centrifuge and everything.

Well...

2005-07-18T22:29:00.000+01:00

Just wanted to blatantly misuse this in order to say hello to my fellow asses. I have not, as may have been conjectured, fallen off the edge of the world but in fact have just been doing quite a lot of erm, gardening (insert anecdote of your own choice here - choose from A) amusing, B)... well you get the idea).
P.S If someone would answer the burning question of whether the . goes before or after the ) I would be most grateful.

I have a headache

2005-07-11T20:25:00.000+01:00

I've got a headache.

I've had it all day.

It's really annoying.

It won't go away.

Not that we've been neglecting the Drove or anything...

2005-07-10T14:40:00.000+01:00

Hello?

Another 'I've never...' list

2005-05-25T12:50:00.000+01:00

…ridden an elephant
…watched West Brom play at home
…lost a game of Monopoly
…found blue fluff in my belly button
…had a cold sore
…understood how some people can not get basic electronics
…driven a tank
…betrayed someone’s trust
…written more than the first chapter of a story
…been to a casino

My List

2005-05-23T14:55:00.000+01:00

Well, I've never:

1) Been to France
2) Watched an episode of 'Friends' by choice
3) Been attracted to atheletic looking men
4) Snogged anyone under the mistletoe
5) Worn a bikini
6) Had a day without feeling miserable at least once
7) Cycled to work
8) Understood the Dewey decimal system
9) Wanted to swim with dolphins
10) Pretended I was a different nationality just so I could get horribly drunk and celebrate their saint's day.

Here are mine

2005-05-23T00:29:00.000+01:00

I've never:

Owned a supermarket
Died
Fancied Peter Stringfellow
Understood why Peter Stringfellow is so popular with the 'laydeez'
Cut my own hair, well actually I have but I have never cut it into a style
Planned a sucessful space mission
Bought a Big Issue
Eaten a bartender
Traveled faster than the speed of light
Dreaded Big Brother as much as I'm dreading it this year

SHEEEEEEEP!

2005-05-21T19:44:00.000+01:00

I will apologise in advance, just in case, as I've never done this before. And I'm making it all proper English (as best I can anyway) to make it look more....posh.

Anyway, so, finally something 0.12 out of 10 interesting happened in my very dull life. I went to the Lake District for two days! Yes, that's it. Very pathetic unfortunately. So on Friday we went to Bowness-on-Windermere, and had to do some questionnaires, and my friend was attacked by (we think) an American. He was wearing a Las Vegas baseball cap, but at first pretended to be French, then Scottish, then asked where we thought he was from. Naturally, we said "Las Vegas" but he replied "Why did you say that you brats?" and began hitting my friend with his cap. Slightly scary.

The youth hostel at Ambleside wasn't too bad, although there was another school there (a school of chavs it seems) who were Scottish. They scared me.

Friday night wasn't bad, although I accidentally called my teacher an idiot and he heard, which was a little embarrassing. And later on that night he had to come and tell our room to shut up, because we were talking very loudly about, well, something I'd better not say.

On Saturday we went to a hill sheep farm near Grassmere, and did some strange soil measurements. I took pictures of sheep.

Overall, 'twas very rubbish, especially having to get up so early on a Saturday morning. At least we won a bag of jelly babies for doing an amazing poster.

Um, sorry for such a long laborious post, but now I thought I'd better keep with the spirit of things and do a list, so ten things I've never done are:

made a sandwich
watched Grease all the way through
been to Scotland
eaten a maggot
had a nose bleed
been snowboarding
swum in the river Don
watched a snooker match
done a bunjee jump
had to wear glasses

My ten things

2005-05-20T13:27:00.000+01:00

Ok. Hello.
Well, I have never

Dressed up as a Nazi
Caught Weil's disease
Stuffed my face fullof marshmallows to see how many would fit
Managed to watch all of 'The Hunger'
Eaten venison
Been to another world
Broken a bone
Had a proper sword fight
Washed my winter coat
Done the splits successfully

I'm only sulky about 6.

New game

2005-05-19T16:44:00.000+01:00

sorry this is a bit of repetition as I just did this on my other blog, but here are 10 things I've never done:

Voted Conservative
Read anything by Tolkein
Seen Gone with the Wind
Been south of the equator
Lived south of the river
Been to a match that Spurs lost
Been in a hot air balloon
Eaten an amphibian
Worn a miniskirt
Ridden through Paris in a sports car with the warm wind in my hair

Anyone else want to play?

A Thing

2005-05-13T21:44:00.000+01:00

Isn't anyone going to write a thing?

Well I'll write a thing in the meantime:

Hmmm......so what sort of topping do people like on their pizzas? I like chestnuts and broccoli. Ho hum.

2005-05-09T18:58:00.000+01:00

Here is something I wrote a few years ago when I was.....um.....bored.

This is so much better than my actual degree. It may even get me a job.

2005-05-08T23:52:00.000+01:00

The University of Blogging

Presents to
Biscuits

An Honorary
Bachelor of

Whingeing

Majoring in

Survey Science

Signed

Dr. GoQuiz.com

Blogging Degree
From Go-Quiz.com

I like the way it says 'survey sciences'. That's perfect for the polling. Does anyone know if Cassoulet is able to post yet?

Global Planetary Domination

2005-05-01T17:27:00.000+01:00

Wheeee! After hours of fiddling I've finally got the hang of this FTP malarkey, and thus have moved my own blog to my own domain. I know, no one probably cares. But just in case you do, I'm now at www.quinquireme.com. My second move in ten days! Now, anyone fancy some chocolate?

Who dun it?

2005-04-27T00:25:00.000+01:00

Not a review but I've been looking at people's fingerprints lately. The three main types are whorls, loops & arches. So far I've looked at 7 sets of fingers & here's the results:
3 sets: all loops
2 sets: split loops & arches evenly
1 set: 9 loops, 1 arch
me: 8 whorls, 1 loop, 1 double loop (there's info out there if that sounds interesting!)

Why does no one else have whorls? Can every post a comment with what they have!

All in the name of science, it's not at all because I'm trying to track down who stole my Mars bar.

Friday: A Review

2005-04-22T10:44:00.000+01:00

Few people in full-time education or employment would dispute that Friday is by and large the most enjoyable day of the working week. This particular Friday is enhanced no end by the presence of both sunshine and blossoms on trees, both of which tend to send me into a Maria von Trapp state of mind.

A typical Friday may involve a more cheerful air to the journey to your place of work/study, a friendlier aspect than usual to the faces of your fellow commuters, a spring in your step at the thought of the approaching weekend. Sod it, I'll pick up a cappuccino on the way in after all. Then when you get to your destination even your colleagues may well have a readier smile than on other days, and nearly every conversation will include the question "doing anything nice this weekend?"

Friday is the most popluar day to take off work, a fact I find quite baffling. If Friday is the best day of the week, Monday is almost universally acknowledged as being by some distance the worst, and it would seem to me to be blindingly obvious that if you're going to use some of your precious holiday allowance it might as well be on a day that you hate rather than one that's often quite good. There are few more pleasurable experiences than turning off the alarm clock on a Monday morning and turning over for another hour's kip.

But I digress. The typical Friday, with its stock phrases ("so glad it's Friday", "have a good weekend") is ehanced by the likelihood of someone suggesting you go to the pub for lunch and the one-in-a-million chance the boss will have fit of goodwill and suggest you all knock off half an hour early.

All this leads up to the best moment of the day - some might say of the whole week - which for me is at 5.30pm but which for others will simply be whatever time they knock off work/get let out of class. The absolute end of the working week, every minute of the weekend stretching out before you, the prospect of Friday night (in the pub, at the movies, in front of the TV) ahead.

Friday night itself is well-known as being girls'/lads' (delete as applicable) night, when you're free to go out with your mates without repercussions from your other half (if applicable), drink a bit too much and stay out a bit too late without having to worry about getting up early in the morning. Friday nights are often a bit impromptu, resulting in no-one having big expectations and a commensurately greater amount of fun being had by all.

Friday: 9/10 - the only problem with it is having to be at work in the first place.

By the way, in the interests of fair play, I must admit to having filched this idea wholesale from the highly original Everything Reviewed.

Idea

2005-04-21T01:31:00.000+01:00

Hello all. It's good to see everyone's getting the hang of the blog. I think it's about time we had some sort of challenge. This is probably a very boring idea but I seem to have lost all imagination. Anyway, I think it would be interesting if we each reviewed something. It can be anything, TV prog, book, game, website, the pie you had for dinner this evening, best chipping potato, and so on. You can write as much or as little as you like, including nothing at all. So there we are.

the bloody fantastic baftas!!!!!!

2005-04-17T20:33:00.000+01:00

well, it's that time of year again, for fans of quality programmes to be disappointed by the choices of supposedly representative panels. i can't quite remember if this was really the case for me last year, but i'm so bloody angry...you can guess why. she was soooo robbed. and can somebody explain the magicality of little britain, because i just don't get it.

EDIT: i love them now. well, the public's choice categories anyway. because, do you know what the whole of that build-up meant? what the whole voting process meant? it meant green wing won!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

maybe it's time for one of the following - a) angry letter; b) mobs with flaming torches or c)...now what was c)... c) can now in fact be celebrations! who's up for virtual shots and champagne?

A vision

2005-04-15T16:35:00.000+01:00

Today I saw the daughter (around age 8 I'm guessing) of Edward & Tubbs.
I was scared. I think we should start a national watch.

2005-04-14T21:52:00.000+01:00

Here we go, my first contribution. A combined effort some years ago by myself and Jax the Insane.

Dreams... dreams, dreams, dreams

2005-04-14T11:50:00.000+01:00

Last night I dreamt a TV series about 5 teenagers, 3 girls & 2 boys, who had objects that gave them special powers. I think this was influenced by Dungeons & Dragons, although I've not seen that for years. The objects were different to that - there was a tiara & a welding mask for 2 of them. And it was set in our current world. The first episode introduced the characters & their 'gizmos' (for want of a better word). The second had a baddie trying to steal their gizmos one by one but they managed to get them back by setting a trap with the last gizmo. The third had giant hands come out of the sky & steal their house, which was moved to an island off Wales. Later the hands moved the kids also & they worked it all out with a Welsh fisherman & got home. I don't remember the others. Maybe they'll come back to me.

Is there too much TV in my life?

good evening all

2005-04-12T00:24:00.000+01:00

well, hello there, this is an entirely new experience for me - blogging and all that jazz. i felt the need to post just to make sure i can keep up with you kids and your newfangled technology. anyway, i checked the cupboard, and at this time of night i can find only alcoholic beverages. still, knowing you lot, i'm sure this is no problem.

anyway, for the pedants, i feel the need to explain myself. i am lazy, apparently something to do with studying maths, therefore the effort required to use the shift key is simply too great unless in relation to some form of punctuation. quite simply, i can't be arsed. so please excuse me, and enjoy. i'll try to be a bit more interesting next time, honest

Surveying the Demographic of the Voter Demographic. Please vote first and then read.

2005-04-11T23:48:00.000+01:00

Let us introduce ourselves, we are Head of Polls, Poppy and Biscuits.

We have decided to start a poll which will determine the nation's predilection to certain numbers. We have selected a random sample of 12345, and over the coming week (or however long we can be bothered) we will observe the findings and discover which figure the public prefer.

And now our prediction....
we predict, based upon extensive research into the field of psychology, that people often like the underdog and so may veer towards the last number, 5. on the other hand, this is a cultural phenomenom specific to Britain, and so non-British voters of may be likely to go for the all-American number one. On the other hand, seeing as we live in a modern democratic society, we think that in this day and age that people do not go for either extreme anymore but prefer a more neutral and less biased approach.

Also we must take into account the Americanisation of many cultures, which may result in people liking number 1 more than they would have before. Still though, sympathy with the underdog may mean that many think 1 is a bit too showy,
and so will go for number 2 instead. Unfortunately, the number 2 can imply rude things with it rhyming with 'poo'. Therefore, people may instead go for either 3, or 4 depending on how much they sympathise with the underdog.

In retrospect: We dont have a clue.

So Biscuits predicts that the number 2 will win the poll because it's not quite
number 1. Poppy predicts that the winner will be number 3, because it's in the middle.
Let the voting commence!

Bodysnatcher, anyone?

2005-04-11T18:50:00.000+01:00

There's been a bit of an invasion today! Hoorah! The posts are breeding.
*looks around* and there's no flies here so that's a bonus.
If only boxes were letting me in (sound familiar?).

[edit] Hmm, so that's something to note. My <> brackets (if they don't show up they're the triangular ones) don't show up. I'll have to use another cunning device.

May I come in?

2005-04-11T09:27:00.000+01:00

Well, I must say, this is a delightful blog. Solid construction, tasteful decor, excellent location, charming neighbours... Yes, I think this will do very well.
*pulls up favourite armchair*
So, whose turn is it to make the tea?

Woohooo!

2005-04-11T07:40:00.000+01:00

I'm in! My quest for global world planetary domination through pretentiousness starts here! Finally, an outlet for all the deeply fascinating, original, witty, pithy thoughts churning around inside my head! Ummmm...you see, now I can't think of anything at all to say. Biscuits! Help!

Tadaaa

2005-04-10T00:11:00.000+01:00

Ok the results on my blog poll were:

A Murder of Crows 12.50% 1

A Drove of Asses 50.00% 4

Shall I Compare Thee to a... Blog? 0.00% 0

The Good Bloggers, the Bad Bloggers and the Ugly 0.00% 0

Ineedadoctor(or something lke that) 12.50% 1

Severally Irritating 12.50% 1

Alley Lurkers Unite 12.50% 1

Something else.
Not as the title, I mean, something thats not in this list. 0.00% 0

Which means A Drove of Asses is our title.

Let's Get This Shoe On The Roof...

2005-04-09T09:15:00.000+01:00